as a male in mixed company

you can either think "every woman in this room fancies me" or "no woman is this room fancies me". maybe mr collins is on to something by adopting the sunnier attitude?

it is a fact universally acknowledged

that every sentient person likes elizabeth bennett. but i didn't realise how closely some women identify with her. what else can explain this vehement dislike of poor, pushing mr collins? unless it be that they are imagining themselves the object of his desperate, simpering affections? in which case i understand their queasiness. to me he is simply wonderful comic relief. absurd, but not odious.

if we all

could but play our parts as well as mr collins plays his (aside from ardent suitor, he's quite hopeless at that). then i think we'd all get on awfully well.