through the looking-glass (we remain)

the other day "the times" reported that a quorum of britain's best bookworms (john carey, et al) had come to the naff decision that the book most expressive of britishness—by which i hope they mean englishness—is orwell's "nineteen eighty-four". among the others mentioned were freud's "civilization and its discontents" or "interpretation of dreams" (no.2), kafka's "the trial", and the ikea catalogue.* such idiocy.

yet another committee meeting gone awry. i love "1984", have read it half a dozen times, but it is not expressive of the quintessence of england. nor is freud. nor is kafka. all are expressions of the continental mind. totalitarianism (generally, and as described in "1984") is a european enjoyment—you can see a mild form of it in the operations of the european union today. england isn't like that. as dickens' mr podsnap says "centralisation? never! not english."

as to my own list, when rounding up the usual suspects, it's hard to limit oneself to five choices. nevertheless here are my five books which best evoke englishness:

1. morrissey, lyrics and interviews (there never has been anything or anyone more intensely english, more often, than mozz).
2. alan bennett, "talking heads" (the first six episodes)
3. kenneth grahame "the wind in the willows" (the trial scene is perfect)
4. the collected poems of larkin or betjeman (according to taste)
5. frank richards "greyfriars" sagas starring billy bunter

honourable mentions to: p. g. wodehouse, graham greene's "brighton rock", jane austen, the foreign office stories of laurence durrell, orwell's "collected essays", "the book of common prayer", delaney's "a taste of honey", waugh's "decline and fall", dickens (especially the "pickwick papers" which wanders all over the high and low of english society), and many more besides.

*special note for hannah: katie price's "being jordan" also made the official list. priceless. that's real reading, that is. what an impressive woman she is.